Friday, February 07, 2014

Of Parenting...



I was at the Cash Converter shop at Ampang Point. This shop buy used good and resell it. It a place where one could convert those house-whole items that they no longer need and turn it into ready cash. The shop then sell these goods to those who want second-hand good to use. It sort of a win win situation for folks. From time to time I would visit this shop. Not that I really would buy things but I love to browse along and look at all that are for sale. On one fine day on impulse I bought a bicycle. As I was going out of the shop with the bicycle a young woman talk to me and said that she too was looking for a bicycle for her kid. And say that had I not bought it she would most likely would.  Soon we got into talking into subjects that just pop up from our minds. I eventually found that she is a working mother with one of her kids in a boarding school. Since I never subscribed to the idea of a boarding school for kids at any early age I told her that it was not wise from my point of view to put kids in a boarding school at too early an age. In this case most boarding school in this country takes in kids at an early age of twelve years old. She said her kid is thirteen and that mean it already in the second year. To me kids should goes to school from their loving home where they get to learn the valuable norms and value of life at home which is almost impossible to learn in boarding school. Living in a hostel is not the same like living in a home. Kids should not be raise in a hostel’s environment but in a home full of love where the parents and kids bonding would remain strong. I told her I did not put any of my kids in boarding school. They all went to schools from home. They all turn out well; in fact beyond my expectation. I at time wonder why especially the middle class Malay still want to send their kids to boarding school when all our non-boarding school are as good. I found that so. I believe parenting would never be the same when the kids are not living in their own home. The parents and kids bonding would never be the same again.  It is different if the kids come from the urban or rural poor where living condition in their home are not as good. But for the middle class parents I believe it is not wise to put their kids in a boarding school at such an early age. Once the kids go to a boarding school at 12 years old he or she would only be back to the home after they had completed their college education. And at that time they would normally be around 24 years old. So to me parents who send their kids to boarding school at 12 years of age would soon lost 12 years of parenting. By the time they end their college education they would be adult already and no longer kids. I believe some folks do not want to hear this. But then it is their choice and not mine. I am sharing these thoughts so that parents may give some thought on what I had said.  Remember you the parents lost 12 years of good parenting time during the prime period of the kid’s life. And that the parenting aspect is lost for that period of time. I believe the kids too miss those wonderful years of been close with their parent where they could learn the norms and value of good living culture. They may get excellent academic result living in a boarding school though but academic result alone does not really help in the development of those young kids into a matured human being. Well that is my 2 cents. 

Have a nice day.

[The image green in this posting show a healthy growth when nurtured with care]

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